There are just people who gets into your nerve wherein their mere presence can instantly suck out the positive aura in any given place. And to meet that person aka boarding house almost everyday is my daily temptation to anger. Well, well, well, life's a challenge and I have to literally take it that way or else I'd go insane.
Hmmm... it's really hard to deal with difficult people. It's better to ignore them actually but please, if they always bug you, that's off the line.
Lord, I really need your guidance everyday. Some attitudes are just so complicated. I wish there is a life feature similar to Facebook where you can delete someone in your friends list. But well, I could do it in Facebook. Just a thought. I wish there was a shut-down system that permits you to stop someone's annoyance and pride so the world could be a better place. Yeah, wishful thinking.
Facing reality, I thought, was like a walk in the park. But to actually experience it is the exact opposite; it is exhausting, nerve-wrecking, and complicated. I realized that taking final exams was easier. Really. You see, I live "independently" now since I work away from home: a boat ride away to be exact. I am away from H-O-M-E. And for someone who is a home-buddy person, home means a lot.
Graduating from college opened a lot of doors and oppurtunities for me. And that includes being a grown-up. Because of that, I am often stressful and tired. Sometimes, I just want to give up and stop all these negative atmosphere. More often than not, I ask myself "What am I doing here?" and "Why am I doing all these?"
But I'm not a quitter. I know that these negative stuff are not worth my retreat. I shall always go forward because I know, better things are waiting ahead. And someday, I will just laugh whenever I would recall these confusion because life's a lesson. I may not understand everything but I know enough that God never compromises a person's character for nothing. I just have to be firm and strong.
Yeah, the world is too much to handle. And how ironic it is that on a smaller scale, lives are much difficult to hanlde. Maybe it's beacause we are fighting with ourselves. A battle exists in our minds and hearts that tortures our soul and pushes our mortal bodies to the verge of a final retreat.
I guess this is too personal to be said on a blog. And I know that it is. All these rumblings and rants may be an insignificant voice to a vast universe but hey, I don't care. I really don't care about anything as long as I have my family. Literally. And all those questions that I've been asking myself really have answers already. What I'm doing here on earth is for my family and Why I am doing all these compromises, sacrifices, and self-mortifications is for a better future for them as well.
All of us have our own set of problems. And it is really up to us how we can handle it inspite of it all. It is up to us how we can still smile even our our internal system breaks down simultaneously. It is up to us if we allow these life's temporary nuisance to make us forget that life is simple, God never forgets, and our family cares for us.
Sometimes, we deserve to be taken aback with problems so we would still be reminded of saying our prayers everyday. Because I realized that in happiness and jubiliations, we think that nothing could go wrong so we forget (or neglect) temperance, prudence, and humility. And those difficult situations and people that God brings to our lives are His way to poke us and to tell us that "Hey, this is your test for today. Pass it with flying colors." So whatever test you're giving to me Lord, I am up to the challenge!
PS. I just really wish you would instead give me a Calculus or Circuits exam because real-life tests are way too difficult to pass. Okay, okay, I won't complain anymore ;)
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